I’ve been wanting to make an update for a while, though I haven’t had a whole lot to say. We’ve gone quiet, but many families, people and couples navigating transition or some form of LBGTQ parenthood still find us. Sometimes I wonder what people must think of our long absence, and whether they assume it means our relationship has or has not survived. We’re still solid as a family, the kids are ages 9 & 6. Gail and I are still in love and by all signs we’re still in it for the long haul.
In my last couple years of quiet, I’ve noticed my own internal tension about how much to share ebb and flow. That tension has always been there, but over the last few years, the scale has tipped more solidly towards keeping more of my thoughts to myself. Some of my silence is feeling a bit more exposed and at risk as a trans parent and a member of a trans-parented family. Some of my silence is wanting to respect my kids and their space to tell their own stories as they age and become more and more of their own people. Some of my silence is needing to take a break and live my own life for a while with less of an outward facing public story. Needing to tell seemingly everyone in my life my most personal struggles left me craving some privacy. But know that I am (and we are) still here, we’re still figuring things out just like everyone else, and we’re still cheering on the new generations of Trans, Bi and L/G/Q parents and families.