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First Time Second Time

~ Thoughts on relationships, roles, taking turns, gender and parenting from a queer family

First Time Second Time

Category Archives: Transition

COLAGE camp at Family Week, 2014

August 5, 2014

We’re back from Family Week 2014 in Provincetown, MA. There are any number of details I could tell you about …

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Belonging

July 24, 2014

As Ezekiel wrote, we’re heading to Family Week 2014 in Provincetown next week. I find that my thoughts in anticipation …

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Providing Surgery Support to a Partner

May 19, 2014

Since Ezekiel wrote a post about top surgery, I decided to write my own. Supporting Ezekiel through surgery was harder …

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Being the only mom vs. being one of a pair

April 23, 2014

I have been chewing on this post for a long time. I am a non-gestational parent to my youngest child, …

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Gratitude

April 18, 2014

Gail and I have been writing here, about extremely personal matters, for over 6 years (off and on), in a …

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Forgetting

February 23, 2014

Yesterday, after putting it off for about a year, my religious community held a sort of naming ceremony for me. …

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Strange moments of arrival

December 20, 2013

(1) I was traveling for a conference about a month ago, and as I walked to a city bus stop …

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Subtle shifts

October 17, 2013

I realized last week that I’d gone an entire day in which I was not gendered as female in any …

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Voice

September 17, 2013

Without getting into too much detail, for me, religious practice is a little complicated. In part, it involves desperately avoiding …

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You can ask

July 23, 2013

As Gail and I have made more connections with trans parents, both online and in person (there were several great …

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About Us

We are Gail, a queer mom, and Ezekiel, a trans dad, parents to Leigh (born 2006) and Ira (born 2009). We've been writing here about the challenging and amazing parts of queer parenting since 2008. Prior to Ezekiel's transition, we thought of ourselves as a two-mom family. We've preserved that writing under his old pseudonym Lyn and old posts by Gail. You can read more about us here.
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New Here?

If you came here looking for information about trans* issues or transition, start with the post "Are we there yet?" and work your way forward or just poke around the "Transition" category.

If you want transition from the partner's point of view, check out the category "Trans* Partner."

If you are a non-gestational parent, we've written tons for you! You can follow the category "NGP issues".

If you are interested in induced lactation, see this wrap up post by Gail.

Categories

  • Before the baby
    • Another baby?
    • Pregnancy and birth
    • Trying to Concieve / Before Baby
  • Best of FTST
  • Coming out
  • Family of origin
  • Inducing lactation
  • Interacting with the world
  • Links and Reviews
  • Nursing and bottle feeding
  • Parenting
  • Queer & Trans* Families
  • Roles and Relationships
    • Donor conception
    • Gender
    • GP (gestational parent) issues
    • NGP (non-gestational parent) issues
    • Shared parenting
    • Siblings
  • Switching uteri
  • Trans* Partner
  • Transition
    • Physical transition
    • Social transition
    • Transition and Kids
    • Transition at work
    • Transition in LTR
  • Uncategorized
  • Work-Family issues

Archive

Blogroll

  • Adventures of a trans man
  • Bionic mamas
  • Breaking into blossom
  • Daddyhood Transcribed
  • Day daddy night daddy
  • Evolving gender
  • Insert metaphor
  • Joe's transition
  • Matt Kailey: Tranifesto
  • My life without tits
  • Neutrois nonsense
  • Planting rainbows
  • Queer dads
  • Queer rock love
  • Southeast soffa
  • The falco project
  • Visibly transparent

Resources for Trans* Partners

  • ’Is this the ‘New Normal?’ Suggestions for Coping with the Tough Parts of Your Partner’s Transition
  • ElectricDade (YouTube) YouTube channel of Dade, which also features videos by Dade’s wife Tiffany.
  • Elspeth Brown's Transpartner's Project This has a list of resources including academic papers and multimedia (video, etc.)
  • en|Gender Blog & resources, including forum & email list, for all, but leans toward partners of trans women
  • Everyday to Stay Short documentary by Chase Joynt about two couples in which one partner is an FTM man
  • FTMSweethearts YouTube collab channel featuring partners of trans men.
  • How to support FTM partner or SOFFA
  • My life with a transman Possibly abandoned blog by a partner of a transitioning man
  • Permission to Live Blog by former fundamentalist/quiverfull mom, now lesbian partnered trans woman parenting 5 kids.
  • TMatesFTM (YouTube) An active YouTube collab channel featuring partners of FTM people.
  • Trans-positioned by Loree Cook-Daniels Perspectives specifically for lesbian-identified partners of FTM men
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